It is natural to feel upset when you leave your child at nursery initially

You have spent months or years caring for their every need. You are likely to feel a mixture of emotions including sadness and guilt but this is entirely normal. To prepare yourself and your child for starting nursery we recommend the following:

• Familiarise your child with being left with others such as grandparents or friends. This will allow your child to adjust to not spending all their time with you and build their confidence to spend time with others in new settings.
• Take your child to playgroup so that they get the opportunity to mix with other children.
• Ensure that your child attends the free nursery trial session so that they have some familiar faces before starting.
• Experience has shown that the more frequently a child attends the sooner they settle. Abacus would recommend that your child attends at least twice a week. One day a week is unsuitable for babies as they seem to forget all about us in the seven days between sessions.
• Don't let your child see you are upset when you leave them. Children are very sensitive to your feelings and this can cause distress and insecurity in the child. We have found that a cheerful goodbye and cuddle in the hall is the best way.
• Occasionally we have parents who wish to settle their child in the child's room themselves. We have found this to be counterproductive as the child will not socialise with the other children if the parent is there. Also it is confusing for the child when the parents stop doing this.
• f your child is upset a member of staff will cuddle them and reassure them until they have settled.
• It is perfectly normal for children to cry when being parted from their parent. At Abacus this is short lived and by the time the parents' gets to the gate they have normally stopped.
• You are welcome to watch your child via the glass panels in the doors at any time.
• You are welcome to go into your child's room when you are collecting them. We ask that a staff member accompany you up the stairs as we have had problems in the past with gates not being shut properly.
• It is perfectly normal for children to cry when you return in the settling period. This is why we suggest you view them via the glass panels prior to them seeing you.
• Discuss any concerns you have with the staff.
• Please ring as many times as you want to. We want you to be reassured and happy as well as your child.